What Can I Say? I'm Thankful!

I'm not sure if everyone else shares this sentiment, but, seriously, this year has flown by so swiftly. I mean just nine days left? Jeez! Any ways, like so many other people do at the end  (or, in my case, towards the end) of the year, I'm taking stock and discovering I have a lot to be thankful to God for.

Sometimes, when people think about being thankful, they expect that you have to be thankful only for something as ginormous as waking from a coma or receiving that long awaited miracle. Those are certainly things to be thankful for, but even things we take for granted or feel are 'basic' like waking up, good health and active senses are equally ginormous and things worthy to be thankful for. Just ask (or think about) those who don't have the luxury of any or all of these so called basic things.

Urging people to be thankful is definitely not news. There are so many sayings and clichés that enjoin you to give thanks, but it is easier said than done.

Frankly, there are times when I don't feel thankful, when my problems and things I long for but haven't received seem to overshadow the things I have; and being thankful is the farthest thing on my mind. There is also the matter of being thankful not guaranteeing that problems will suddenly disappear, that a flashing rainbow will instantly emerge in my bleak horizon (sue me, I am one of those people who expects immediate results and likes flashing rainbows, apparently!).

Even though thankfulness does not mass produce flashing rainbows, what it does is that it makes you aware of what you do have. It also shows appreciation to your maker. Again, thankfulness makes for a less stressful life, because it makes you live in the present and reminds you that you have survived so far without all those things you are pining for.

Like every other person on the planet, there is so much I wish I could accomplish that I didn't this year, but I would be a liar if I said there weren't so many other things I am thankful for.

Some of the things I'm thankful for are in this evidently non-exhaustive, off-the-top-of-my-head list.

*The ability to nurture my relationship with God in spite of the ups and downs of this year.

*The privilege to have  a great (can't stress this adjective enough) family and lovely friends.

*The ability to 'unfriend' and/or distance myself from negative people.

*The capacity to be truly happy without feeling guilty about it.

*The time and energy to binge on SpongeBob SquarePants and other shows and movies while balancing other activities in my life.

*The good nature to find humour in every situation and risk quizzical glances that make me laugh even more.

*The (still growing) acceptance of my awkwardness and 'interesting' personality.

*The retention of my ability to not care so much about what people think, especially when such opinions are not constructive.

*The wherewithal to eat, drink (even if it's just water and juice... not forgetting the fizzy drinks too), live under a non-leaking roof, stay in touch with friends, family, and those who defy categorisation.

*The patience to not hurl my bag at the bus driver when he drives too slow on those days when I'm running late, or the shop keeper when my lottery tickets are duds, or the technician at my school who vanished when I asked him to fix a technical problem with my university card, or those who are more concerned about what I can get them than my welfare, or... (yeah, I think that's enough exposure for now).

*The compassion to weep with those who are hurting and laugh (more raucously than) (with) those who are happy.

*The strength to shout at the screen and run commentary when I'm watching things on the TV or my laptop (this habit unfortunately also follows me to the cinema, but I'm still thankful).

*The wisdom to know that I have all that I need.

*The ability to kick my Facebook and BBM addiction. Yay!

*The ability to know I cannot please everybody all of the time and to be okay with this realisation.

*The privilege to sing to myself and risk glances (and the occasional compliments, I got one again today) from passersby.

*The fortitude to realise that problems that have knocked me off my feet and driven me to despair have thought me valuable lessons about life, especially how to handle difficulties.

*The opportunity to have this blog and write about random things that affects people's lives for good (a girl can dream *wink* *gap-toothed smile* [for some reason it is gap-toothed, though I am not gap-toothed!]).

I think I'd just stop here before I veer into doe-eyed looks. Just listing these abilities and privileges and capacities (and I need to stress that this is by no means exhaustive, so all of you thinking I have only 18 things to be thankful for... ) has shown just how much I have and how much I have to be thankful for this year.  So, maybe like me, you ought to write a list of things you're thankful for, no matter how minute or 'basic' they might seem. It might surprise you how many things you have to be thankful for.

Have thanks-filled remaining days of 2013 and 2014, in advance!

My Pet Peeve - The Backbite and Frontsmile

I rarely get surprised by human behaviour. In fact, I pride myself on being a pseudo psychologist, which then somehow (operational word) qualifies me to accurately (well, at least half the time) predict and explain behaviour. I beg you, though, don't ask me to guess what you're thinking next time you see me or get in touch with me, you just might be the subject of my next rant.

One thing always gets me though, every time! That is the ability of people to say bad things behind a person's back and then be extra nice to their face. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr (I'd go on, but I'm seeing doublessss).

What prompted me to rant about this, apart from years of being surprised and annoyed by this... this... 'thing', was a programme I attended last weekend (well, there goes the anonymity of this story). Moving on... there was a lady at the programme who was quite normal in my estimation. On one of the days, she was running late and a discussion ensued about her that I was 'privileged' to observe. She was described in such terms as kooky,  fibber, unfortunate,  and so on; but when she showed up minutes later, the very same individuals that were on the forefront of the campaign against her were the first to talk about being worried about her, and love, kisses and hugs, and all that jazz (I exaggerate, of course, but you get the gist).

There are two things that immediately go through my mind when something like this happens:

1. I wonder what they say behind my back

2. Why? What? Wh...? 

I think what annoys me most is the acting all friendly afterwards. I am not excusing backbiting but I would expect that if you can't either shut up or say the negative things to the person's face then do not act all lovey-dovey with them. 

Also, about saying negative things to someone's face (or to their inbox and other such personal correspondence facilities on social media), it's not really as bad as it's made to be. If you were someone like me, that person would be your favourite person. Well, right after your parents, siblings, that uncle and aunt that call ever so often to make sure you're still alive, the funny guy on YouTube that just cracks you up, the toothless old woman that smiles at you at the bus-stop, the ... (see what it's like to be me?).

As long as you don't say it in such a nasty way, I don't see why that shouldn't be an option. Let me say this again (albeit differently) - people who can say negative (but true) stuff about me to my face are the people I respect the most... well, right after my parents, my siblings, that uncle and aunt that call ever so often to make sure I'm still alive, the funny guy on Youtube that just cracks me up, the toothless old woman that smiles at me at the bus stop.... 

That's it for now. Rant over. Time to wait for the next surprising episode of Backbite, Frontsmile. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

My Questionable Singing Talent

I have always loved singing, though I don't believe it's the kind of singing that will let me even pass the audition stage at X Factor.

I can imagine Simon saying, after some minutes of watching me sing with an incredulous look on his face, "That was the most horrendous sound I'd ever heard, it was like a cat trying to outrun a chicken" or something like that.

Even the awareness that my voice isn't X Factor worthy doesn't make me stop singing. I sing when I'm happy, when I'm sad, when I'm bored, when I'm busy. I probably even sing in my sleep. I sing everywhere too, in the shower, the toilet, in class, my workplace, the streets... the list goes on.

The interesting thing is that I get unwilling audience, like the girls in the toilet stalls at work or the old lady at the bus-stop, complimenting me on my voice, "You sound great. You should go on X Factor". Yeah right! On the plus side, now I know why those delusional people go on these shows, screeching through a song and challenging judges who condemned their singing by saying, "People liked it."


I have to say, not everybody is on board. My live-in landlady normally comes to knock on the door and says apologetically, "Ummm... people are going to work in the morning, if you could whisper it," or just shut up (she doesn't say this part but it's definitely implied); and I would get all embarrassed and apologise, then do it again the next day, although in all fairness, I try to sing an octave lower. It's like a curse or, less dramatic, a habit that I can't shake off because I enjoy it so much.

Then I joined a choir and I found out what my flaws were, specifically. First, I don't sing loud enough, probably from years of being told to hush or trying to sing quietly without having someone come knock on my door or give me those heart-attack inducing looks.

Also, I was told I jumped from musical part to part. Even now after three weeks in the choir, I don't know what part I sing primarily, alto, soprano, tenor, it's all a blur. I sing whichever part comes out and it's a joke. I'm definite though that I don't sing bass; so, one down two to go. Woohoo!

One thing I'm happy about is that even though I have always known I am not the best singer, I now know what the problems are specifically and what I need to do to remedy these going forward. And, if I choose to have a singing career... hey, who knows?

Honestly, I still don't think I'd be able to pass the audition stage at the X Factor any time soon, but I anticipate singing better; so that even when I'm singing loudly in my room, my landlady would knock on my door and say with tears in her eyes when I open the door, "That's the most wonderful sound I've ever heard.... Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"

Then I'd say, "Ewww... that's a pickup line", and start singing Aretha Franklin's 'Respect'.

Age, Friendship Shift, BFFs and All That Jazz

They say you get wiser with age.

Well, I'm not sure about the wiser part. I mean, I still expect to win the lottery every time I scratch the lottery tickets. However, I guess if there's something aging has thought me, it is the change in erstwhile rock-solid friendships and relationships as a whole.

I'm going to press the brakes here to issue a disclaimer. This post might take an academic turn now and again (by academic I mean there'll be a continuum  and at least one definition).

With that out of the way, let me proceed. So, friendships change... news flash! You see why I doubt the older-wiser theory? Anyways, I have had a lot of great friends over the years, some 'greater' than others. With age, distance and change in status etc, we have sort of grown apart. Interestingly, for other friends, we have grown closer; even some acquaintances of mine have somehow turned into great friends.

So, I propose (here comes the academic part) a continuum:

                                    Great/Good Friends

                                             ↕ 

                                          Friends 

                                             ↕

                                      Acquaintances
                                                        ↕
                              Enemies/Frenemies/Extinct Friendships

This I call a Friendship Shift Continuum which represents the spectrum of stages between great friends and the extreme - enemies/frenemies or even outright extinct friendships. You see, there will always be factors that will (seek to) change or shift the status of your friendships (and, by extension, every other type of relationship). These factors include distance, change in status, rumours, pride, etc.

There will always be a shift in friendship, even momentary, for better or for worse; however what determines where the relationship is headed is whether you two are determined to make the relationship work.

This is where it begins to sound like every other advice on romantic relationships. Surprise, surprise, friendships are like romantic relationships (emphasis on 'relationship')! Wiser?

Where I am headed with this however is the realisation that there is usually a friendship shift. It does hurt sometimes when that person you had a close bond with suddenly falls to the acquaintance zone or off the continuum entirely.

However what I have found useful in repairing these relationships, if you think they are worth it (unfortunately you might have to let some people go) are four things (there might be more... I'll probably get to know them when I'm pushing 50). I call this the CARE principle (yes, I'm so proud of myself right now):

*Communication (blunt communication): If you feel there's something that is serving as a barrier in your relationship, address it, bluntly. Tell the other person if you feel they're worth having. For instance (and this is only an example), "I think it's been awkward between us because I hate the brand of shampoo you're using". Also, continue to communicate. Do not let awkward silences stretch for years... that's just wrong.

*Awareness: Be aware that friendships change, even if you were sworn childhood BFFs, with matching necklaces and all. It's okay if a great friend slides into the friend or acquaintance zone, or if an erstwhile acquaintance moves up to the great friend zone.

*Remember: Yeah, remember the reason why you became and stayed friends for as long as you did.

*Evaluation: Determine whether the friendship is worth salvaging - upgrading or downgrading. You can't be best friends with some people forever. It might be that they fit more of an acquaintance role now. Again, if the friendship isn't mutually beneficial or if you've tried all within your power and it's beginning to seem you are forcing yourself on them, well... burn that bridge.

Well, go assess your friendships or something!

Do It Yourself - Seven Ideas

Let me tell you a story. I had a clogged sink this weekend and discovered we didn't have a plunger; short of getting dressed and shopping for one or just taking a hammer to the sink, I didn't know what to do.Then, it hit me! I remembered the way we used to unclog sinks when I was younger and voila, it worked!

So, here is a list of the simple things you could do to make life easier for you without having to spend unnecessarily.

1. Broomsticks in the sink: Yes, get some thick broomsticks and thrust them repeatedly in the sinkholes. Alternatives would be hair pins or any other long strong thin stuff and do same.  If symptoms persist, consult the plumber or just take a hammer to the sink!

2. Salt and water: This solution is a great cure for diarrhoea (no matter how chronic). You can also effectively brush your teeth with salt if you run out of toothpaste.

3. Shaving sticks and those clothes. In the absence of a lint remover, you can simply shave off the lint on your old clothes with a shaving stick.

4. Straws and hairpins: Yeah, in the absence of curlers, you can simply use straws and hairpins, that's if you do have straws and hairpins. If you don't, I hope it's not too late to ask you to disregard number 4.

5. Thread for the floss. If you don't want to buy dental floss or just don't have any available for that emergency situation, just draw a thread from your clothes and take it to the teeth. You might want to be careful about pulling off the thread though, you don't want to end up thread-bare.

6. Ringworm and toothpaste: Yep, apply toothpaste to ring-worms. It works, believe me (I need to point out that this is from second-hand observation).

7. Plastic bag/Cellophane: use this as an alternative to a shower cap against the rain or for steaming your hair.

Honourable mention: Rub two stones together to produce fire!
.

One Direction? Not Quite

Yeah, I know it's been ages since I've posted anything.

Reason? It might be easiest to say I've been too busy; but, that would be a lie.

The truth is I have been sidetracked by issues more germane to life - eating, sleeping, studying, working, clipping my toenails, and so on and so long.

Apart from that, I have actually just not had anything concrete to write about, or at least the fragmented ideas swimming in my brain didn't made it to the computer.

I wouldn't entirely blame it on writers' block or a sudden fear of my own blog page.

Many of the things I do want to write about require some degree of research, which is annoying for me; I mean this consciousness that I need to research something before writing it.

Anyways, it seems for the past couple of months, I've found myself being pulled in more directions than one - moving house, studying, trying to keep up with the Kardashi... sorry, I meant my folks and peeps, trying to adapt to a new environment and just trying not to miss the bus.

I've not always been successful (apologies to my peeps who haven't heard from me since May, if you've not heard from me since before May... well, that might be because of an entirely different reason #awkward).

There just seems to be too many things to do all the time.

Well, I guess that's it for now. Hope to blog more often now, toe-nail length notwithstanding.

Oh, before I go... if you came here looking for stories about One Direction - the boy band, or wanted something 'juicier', I'm sorry, you've probably realised by now you're reading the wrong post #awkward.

Another Birthday! Sarcastic Yay.

I have always been ambivalent about my birthdays. No, that's not correct; let me rephrase that... I started to become ambivalent when I discovered birthdays weren't just the one day in the year when dad gave us money to splurge big-time on chocolates, pasties and other goodies. That would mean my ambivalence started at about the age of 16 (What can I say? I'm a late bloomer).

Anyway, since then, my birthdays have been days I look forward to on one hand, and wish were non-existent, on the other hand.

I think the best way to show this ambivalence would be to highlight four major things I like about birthdays and another four I dislike about them. And, believe me, nothing spells ambivalence more  than the same items appearing in both segments; so, here goes:

The Likes:

1.  A Landmark: Birthdays are landmarks. They mark the end of a year and the beginning of a new one. It's definitely a time to take stock and then move on.

2. Corny Birthday Phrases: Yeah, you know the 'Send my slice of the birthday cake', 'Where's the party at?', 'Who's taking you out?', 'You don old o', 'Jungle don mature', et cetera. As recycled as these phrases are, it's somehow great to know I am on the receiving end of all of that for JUST ONE DAY in a year.

3. Contact from 'Friends' I Haven't Been in Touch with for Months (12 Months to Be Exact): Birthdays are days when many people suddenly remember you exist. It is kind of nice when passive or semi-active  'friends' become active for just one day.

4. The Gifts: This is not just material gifts (though I have to say that giant teddy bear I requested is still important *wink*), it's the prayers, the wishes, the texts, the calls (even the missed ones, aka 'flashing'), the Facebook messages and posts, et cetera.

The Dislikes:

1. The Pressure to Celebrate: There is definitely pressure to celebrate birthdays. Sometimes I just want to stay home and celebrate by having a quiet uneventful time, but staying home alone is somehow considered an anomaly.

I feel compelled to get the cake, the birthday rice and meat, the party hats, the painting the town red, the confetti girls, the limousine, the white horse, the unicorn... okay, I think I'm beginning to talk about a different ceremony now. Let's go to number two.

2. Those Corny Birthday Phrases: Yep, I do have a love/hate relationship with this one. Even though I use them myself and appreciate that they are used as fillers, they do get old sometimes, don't they?

3.  Contact from 'Friends' I Haven't Been in Touch with in Months: This is another one of those ones I love and hate.   Sometimes I think I'd rather have these fair-birthday friends (Get it? Fair-weather, fair-birthday?) either contact me  at least one other time in the year or just not even contact me at all.

4. Friends Forgetting My Birthday: Yeah, I mean even with Facebook reminders and all, some people that I would count as friends still somehow forget my birthday, there are others who wish me happy birthday a day before the date or even a month later without acknowledging or maybe not even realising their error. Seriously?

At the end of the day, I'll still have birthdays whether I want them or not; so, happy birthday to me, where's the party at?

About A Competition and A Winner

Watching Candice Glover win on American Idol brought tears to my eyes. Well, most things bring tears to my eyes these days, usually for a variety of reasons. In this case, it was an inspirational reason, a hurrah to sticking it out.

For those of you who don't watch American Idol, Candice was just named the 12th winner of the competition, and the first female winner in about 6 years.

However, that is not the crux of this post. She had auditioned for the show twice in the past, 2009 and 2011, but had not made even the top 30 spot both times. In spite of popular opinion and personal misgivings, as you can imagine, she auditioned again this year and the rest is history (I feel I must add, 'as they say').

Well, if you haven't already guessed what direction this story is taking, here's an extensive break down. Most times, we go through a lot of setbacks in achieving our dreams. There are times when it seems all our best efforts lead to failure. Like Candice, we audition, attend interviews, get contacts, send manuscripts, change our appearance, modify our behaviours, take lessons, attend seminars... the list is endless, but we never quite make the cut. It's easy to give up, to go with the flow, to have a constant fear of failure when even the thought comes up to try again.

Candice's is certainly not the only story of persistence triumphing after repeated failure; from Albert Einstein to people in our families and neighbourhood, stories abound of trying again and again until dreams were realised.

The reason, I think, why we give up is because we find it difficult to compare our circumstances with other's who have triumphed, which could be a good thing on certain levels. It is easy to believe when we face set backs that our situation is unique, and in all fairness it is, to us. I, myself, have been in situations where people asked me, trying to encourage me, to think about others who had been through similar circumstances. Several times, what I have said, at least in my mind, was, "Ding it! I don't care what others go through, all I care about is what I am going through".

So, this is a lesson for me as well. At least this justifies my tears while watching the show (I hope). It certainly won't be easy to persist; you might have close friends and family and yours truly, the mind, say 'Give it up already, you don't want to keep embarrassing yourself'.

Again, I say persist - try again and again and again and again and again... and (okay that's enough agains for now, you get the message). I should hasten to add that this trying again should not be mindless no-improvement trying again like the kind defined as insanity. It should be the persistence of someone who has used each setback to hone their craft, to perfect their skills, so that they are in a better position to succeed than they were previous times.


This season might not be your season, but the next season just might!

Great Thriller Movies... with a Twist!

I don't know about you, but when I'm watching a thriller, especially a whodunit, mystery, or crime one, I expect a twist in the end, that unforeseen situation that leaves you speechless just when you think you know all the answers. I mean, there are thrillers that work well without a twist at the end (more about that in another post), but, mostly, let's just say I'm a bigger fan of thrillers with a twist than those without one. Here are some amazing ones I have watched and I'm sure you'll enjoy as I have.

1.Taking Lives (2004): In this mind-blowing psychological thriller, an FBI agent (Angelina Jolie) searches for a serial killer who takes on the identity of his victims.

2.The Skeleton Key (2005): A supernatural horror thriller about a young hospice nurse (Kate Hudson) who gets entangled in the mystery involving the dark past and the inhabitants of a house where she's employed.

3.The Sixth Sense (1999): A supernatural horror thriller about a boy (Hayley Joel Osment) who communicates with the dead and the child psychologist (Bruce Willis) who attempts to help him with his troubles.

4.Unbreakable (2000): In this superhero thriller, a security guard (Bruce Willis) discovers that he is extraordinary after a fatal accident. This movie also stars Samuel L. Jackson.

5.The Others (2001): A psychological horror thriller about a woman (Nicole Kidman) who lives in an isolated house with her kids and is convinced that her house is haunted.

6.Perfect Stranger (2007):  In this psychological thriller, a journalist (Halle Berry) goes undercover to try and find proof that a businessman (Bruce Willis) killed her childhood friend.

To be continued in next post :)

Part 2: Great Thriller Movies ... with a Twist!

Without further ado, here are the remaining great thrillers with a twist at the end.

7. Saw (Parts 1 to 7; 2004 to 2010, respectively): A personal note here: I do realise there are seven parts to this movie, but believe me once you watch part 1, you won't stop until you watch part 7! The movies revolve around a vigilante who rather than killing his victims outright involves them in a series of tests to gauge their willingness to live.

8. Passengers (2008): In this psychological thriller, a psychotherapist (Anne Hathaway) becomes suspicious when her clients, victims of a plane crash, begin to disappear.

9. House of 9 (2004): A thriller in which nine strangers are kidnapped and locked up in a house to involuntarily participate in a maniac's reality show, with a cash prize of five million dollars for the survivor.

10. A Little Trip to Heaven (2005): Another personal note: in all honesty, this movie does start a little slow but it picks up in the middle (or is it more towards the end?). In this thriller, an insurance adjuster (Forest Whitaker) investigates a suspicious fatal accident and the beneficiary of the death benefit (Julia Stiles).

11. Red Riding Hood (2011): This dark fantasy thriller revolves around the identity of a werewolf which terrorises a village and its relationship with the 'Red Riding Hood' (Amanda Seyfried).

12. The Village (2004): In this psychological thriller, the people in an isolated village believe that their peace treaty with mythical creatures living in the woods bryond them has come to an end.

Okay, so that's it FOR NOW. Be assured that there will be more (perhaps I can emulate Saw and make it seven installments ;)) as I continue my exploration and enjoyment of thrillers with a twist!

A Rant about Scholarships

Okay, this really is a rant about scholarships - specifically applying for and not getting it.

I mean, I do appreciate that there might (the operational word is 'might') be people that are more worthy of the scholarship than me, but... hey, all is fair in love and .... No, that's not the quote for this rant. Wait, why is there even a quote for this rant? I already feel I'm digressing.

Back to my rant. Anyone who's ever applied for a scholarship knows how difficult it is not to get it.
You know you were worth it, you know your proposal was strong enough, you know you met the criteria... so why in the world did they pass up on you? Was there some wizened professor who spread snot on your personal statement section? Did your application slip into a shredder before it could be assessed? Who was that person who was more qualified than you? Why... there are so many questions, and no answers.

Personally, I do not believe in coincidence and so I believe everything happens for a reason, but it doesn't stop the resultant anger, confusion, and the whole avalanche of rant-inducing emotions that you suffer.

Don't think I have not tried other avenues to come up with money on my own. Believe me, I have tried all possible (moral, I should add) avenues; many of them utterly laughable - business ideas that have fallen as flat as pancakes, working overtime with the few pennies it adds to my already meager savings, attempting to sell personal belongings, even random thoughts about busking (it definitely gives another meaning to 'it's the thought that counts'). Lest I forget, there's even trying to win the lottery!

All I know is that this year will not pass me by, by fire by force!

That's the spirit we ought to adopt though, isn't it? I mean, what are the alternatives?

I guess all I have to do now is wait for some philanthropist to accidentally stumble on this blog and 'reach out' *wink, wink*.

I wonder if I should post my phone number... just in case!

Five Myths International Students Believe

As someone who's been an international student, I have to say there are perks to studying abroad, not only do you get to increase your academic knowledge, you also get to interact with a wide range of other people and cultures and hence learn more about the world. You become... what's the word? Aha, 'enlightened'!

On the flip side, there are things that are non-perks. Subsequently, there is the characteristic disappointment once some people find out that many of the things they expected to experience are elusive. The problem here might be those unrealistic expectations aka myths fuelled by glossy advertorial  brochures, some word of mouth lies, or just plain wishful thinking.

These are five of those myths that international students:

1. You will instantly make friends and blend in: Not! Contrary to what you see in all those glossy brochures and leaflets, that is not true. In short, you will suffer some degree of culture shock, whether you are Mr. or Ms. Friend-maker or not. There will be times when you will feel alone, misunderstood, and just plain stand out like a red snake in green grass.

2. You are guaranteed a job by your university during and after your study: Yeah right! Some universities DO tell you this to attract you to their schools. As much as universities' career units help you to try and get a job, the majority of the work depends on you (and maybe the economy *wink*). Do not expect automatic jobs and don't be surprised if you don't get a graduate job after graduating.

3. The pictures aren't always real: This is when you call me Captain Obvious. I mean, the very nature of advertisement, most times, is to present something far duller in reality in a more pleasant and 'shinier' light. However, just for the sake of those who still believe that the pictures depict exactly what is obtainable in reality, prepare to be disappointed.

4. You won't need to study that hard: Hahahahahahahahhahah. Pardon my laughter. It does go without saying that you are a student because you are studying, but I know many people including yours truly who thought it would be easy-breezy. My advice - prepare to study HARD!

5. Your dreams will come true: To this I have to say, hmmm *turning my hand left and right*. This is not entirely a myth, but don't expect this to just happen by virtue of your studying abroad. There ain't no genie waiting at your hall of residence with three wishes at the ready for you.

Okay, so I'm not trying to be Liz the Downer here, but I guess I'm just trying to make your expectations more realistic, and, of course save you from disappointments. So, welcome international students!!

Part 2: Baba Said (The Offering of a Writer's Block Sufferer)!

When he lifted his head and looked with the corner of his eye, he discovered the eyes were no longer there. Surprised, he scanned the counters. Their eyes met as soon as he discovered her, and he hissed aloud and turned his head.

When he scanned the place again, she was gone. He almost whistled aloud in relief.

In two seconds, he tried to decide whether to run or wait. He decided on the latter, strengthening himself with the fact that he was a man. He frowned heavily and hoped she would get the message.

"You see say ya wife don go, abi?” The man to his right aptly said. Benji even smiled at him.

However, when Benji got to the bank’s gate, a strange voice stopped him.

"Excuse me… excuse me, please…” he heard. The staccato tone made him turn because he could not tie it with the woman’s face. But, it was her. The eyes. It seemed she had been waiting for him. She smiled as she moved quickly towards him.

"Baba said it’s you o," she said as soon as she got to him, her staccato voice mixed with obvious excitement made her sound like a character from a nightmare. But what made Benji open his mouth was what she had said. He had certainly not expected that.

"Excuse me?” he said, thinking quickly that he must be witnessing the beginnings of lunaticism.

"Are you not an Igbo boy?" she looked down at his trousers. “Are you not wearing black jeans? Ah, Baba said it," she chuckled to herself.

"Benji was sure she was going irredeemably mad. He certainly did not want to be her first victim. He began to turn to leave. One gateman briskly walked towards them.

"Please, you will have to go outside... no loitering,” he said as he pointed to a wooden white post with said statement.

Benji was first to get outside, he was about to cross the road when the woman held unto his arm.

"Will you get your hands off me, you mad woman," he yelled and people stopped to look.

"Please, let’s not create a scene," the woman implored quietly, looking worriedly at him. "Just hear me out, abeg."

Benji determined to hear what she had to say, since she seemed so anxious about it.

"So, what’s it? Look, I don’t have time!” he said harshly.

"You see, Baba… one Baba told me I would see the man that would be my husband this week… that he is Igbo and he’ll be wearing black jeans… and,” she had been looking down all the while, but she looked at him now, excitement in her eyes,  “that’s why I said Baba said it’s you.”

Benji was sure that she was mad, and even if she was not, that she was some dumb, desperate woman who had been played on by a charlatan. He was sure if she really looked around well she would see several Igbo men wearing black jeans trousers.

"The lunatic was talking to herself now, and Benji thought it was the right time to escape.

"It has to be you Baba was talking about…you are Igbo, I noticed the accent when you greeted the man you sat beside, and even the way you look… and it’s already Saturday …Baba said…”

Benji was rushing blindly to cross the road, hoping only to get away from the lunatic. He did not even see the car that hit him.

When he came to, he heard the staccato voice muttering about how he ought to get well for her. But he refused to open his eyes. He knew that he was in a hospital. He simply did not want to see her. He wondered if his fiancée would still be in the house now, wondering why he had not returned from the bank since morning. He wondered if she had even tried to call him on his cell phone. The phone ought to be in his wallet, but he could not open his eyes for the life of him.

He felt so helpless under the intensity of her gaze, even now that his eyes were close.

He felt so helpless that he could not stop the tears from slipping between his shut lids. The woman wiped the tears from his eyes with the back of her hand and smiled broadly.

Baba Said (The Offering of a Writer's Block Sufferer)!

I am suffering from writer's block these days, but I needed to share something on this blog, if only to convince readers the blog is still alive (Lamide, thanks for the 'push'). So, I have decided to post one of my short stories 'Baba said'. I would have to also blame watching 'The thin line between love and hate' for the 20th time today for influencing this decision. The story has a Nigerian flavour, enjoy:

The woman bent over the motionless male form tenderly. She was murmuring things to him as though he were listening.

“Darling, you’ll be okay soon… honey, it will be okay… sweetheart, you’ll be fine…” she kept murmuring in a staccatoic accent. Looking at the scene, one would think they had known each other for a long time. However, they had only just met that morning.

Benji had noticed the woman’s more-than-normal attention on him as soon as he had sat down on the bench at the bank where he had gone to withdraw some money, waiting his turn. It was the sensation that someone was staring unflinchingly at him that made him turn sharply to his right, only to encounter a pair of feminine eyes boldly staring back at him. The look was so possessive and assured that Benji shuddered unconsciously. The man beside him turned to look at him and Benji muttered a sorry.

She was sixth on Benji’s right and had leaned forward and turned her head solely to look at him, it seemed.

Benji turned again to look at her, wondering if she was someone he knew who was waiting for him to recognise her. But even as he turned to look at her again, he met the same eyes and realised that he did not know her. No one would have encountered those eyes, even momentarily, and forgot their owner.

The next two hours of waiting for the woman’s turn so he would be delivered from her optical torture were quite excruciating for Benji.

As the woman leaned forward to continue her unconservative regard, Benji leaned back against the wall. The woman leaned back too and Benji leaned forward. Now, almost everybody was looking at the both of them. The woman beside Benji even tittered, obviously thinking it was some kind of game. Benji did not think so and fired her a deadly look. He even contemplated leaving the bank, but thought against it when he remembered that he had no money at home, and had to send some money to the village for his critically ill mother through a friend who would be leaving for the village very early the next day.

"Stupid cash machines," he muttered. If they had been working he would not be in here. He looked down at his empty wallet and sighed. Perhaps that was what he ought to be doing. Looking down at the reason for which he had come to the bank and totally ignoring the witch’s inexplicable stare.

(to be continued in next post ;D)